Measure twice and cut once

Those of you who have known me personally for some time have come to understand the different variations and liberties I like to take with the epidermis around my neck and face. My beard has always been the source of my power, and through time, adjustments and alterations for purposes of style, practicality or otherwise, are manipulated at what is seemingly random intervals and reasons. Well, I’m here to tell you that when it comes to my beard, none of what I do is random.

A beard is something that takes time, patience and a lot of thought.

About a month before school started, I began growing the chinstrap goatee beard. It looked rather deviant and somewhat dirty, but I was okay with that, because I knew that in eight short weeks, the final product would be something I could be proud of. The goatee would have been close to two inches long, and would have been accompanied by a shorter #1 cut, attaching the goat to my sideburns and the rest of my hair (which is currently a little bit longer than a #2 right now). I was waiting for this year's first BIG CreComm event, to unveil the final product.

 I was then going to shave out the middle section of the goatee right at the center of my chin, leaving about a half inch gap. With the remaining hair, I would have applied some dread wax that has been kicking around since my bush days, and wax the hair into icicles hanging off the side of my chin. Bad-ass, I know.

Would have looked something like this, but
"dreaded"

Unfortunately, I had to edit my appearance for a meeting where the perseverance and dedication of beard growing may not have been fully understood.

Hence the title of this blog; a phrase I learned from a carpenter friend of mine. Measure twice, cut once.

Unlike editing for writing, music or…. Well, at a quick thought- I’m going to say arts in general- editing ones’ appearance is a one-time shot. You had better be damn sure you know what you’re doing before you begin. In writing, the opportunity exists to try something new, mull it over a little bit and make corrections as nessecary. When I write, the backspace key is easily the key I use most, next to the space bar and the letter E.

In grooming- or carpentry for that matter- that isn’t the case. I have to visualize the final product, and the steps required to get there before I do anything. This often takes a lot longer than most people realize. I don’t wake up in morning and say, “I think this will look cool, let’s do it”. No. I actually spend several days, sometime weeks, coming up with a plan, while I suffer through the painfully, and often sneered at, growing phase.

The reward is pulling of a piece of work, that is both bad-ass and something of a conversation started. Fail, and you look like an idiot. The idiot part is true in the traditional editing sense as well, but is usually soon forgotten. Bad haircuts can last as long as one’s friends have memories.

So here I am, back to square one, with not nearly enough time to see the project through to my initial vision. Thankfully though; unlike editing, if I make a mistake, I will always have another opportunity and my mistakes with my beard are mine and mine alone.

Until next time, remember, if you’re not failing, you’re not trying hard enough!

Funny, right?

(ps. I would recommend NOT googling “Goatess” unless you really enjoy photos of the male genitalia)